All my life I never win anything for free. Once in a while my computer or my mobile will mockingly claim that I've won some money or some car. I expect my only offspring would probably have no such luck either. So I thought. My jaw dropped to the floor when I learned that my only daughter Dena who lives in Vancouver won a car! I thought she pulled a prank or something. If you know her you know what I mean. But it's true! For real! Dena you are one Lucky girl. Literally and figuratively, if you know what I mean.
All is good with you? Can we Skype sometime this weekend? Alls goooooood Haha...are you high on something? Just high on life Woohoo! No I'm a little drunk. Lol #@%! Im kidding I know Ive only had one drink. Hahaha Lol. You know your limit. I'm not worry. I know youre not worry. Youre tina Hahaha...you know me too well. So when can we Skype? Um yeah this weekend im free.Like saturday or sunday
To be able to do what you love and love what you do. To be able to be true to who you are. To be able to find joy in the simplest things. To be able to see good in others. To be able to put yourself in others' shoes. To be able to laugh everyday in good company. I envy you Dena. Curiosity doesn't kill the cat, the cat has 9 lives because of its curiosity.
I asked Dena to come with me to North Shore Triathlon in North Vancouver. I saw it as an opportunity to rub off a little tri bug on her. She saw it as an opportunity to hang out with her best friend Dee. She brought a hammock from home and hang it between two gorgeous tall trees near transition area. They slept, talked, munched and repeat in the hammock through the swim, the bike and the run leg. Okay, almost. They did wait for me at the finish line and gave me the biggest and warmest congratulatory hugs ever. I guess the apple fall far so far away from the tree when it comes to multisports & cats. :-)
One lovely cold Wednesday night. Over dinner I told Dena that bad things in life are unavoidable (and yes even people you love is capable of causing you pain). What people say about you or how people treat you are out of your control. The only thing in life that is in your control is how you react to bad circumstances. Bitter or Better? Later after we said goodbye and went our separate ways I found out that my bike's front light was stolen! God has a wicked sense of humour. I laughed out loud. Lesson learned indeed.
She wore a ripped denim overalls, a wool beanie hat, and carried a skateboard. After dinner she took me to a park to play swing. She said it's the tallest swing in Van city and if you go up high enough you can see the mountain. She is soon to be 22. She is the epitome of George Bernard Shaw's quote: We don't stop playing because we are old, we grow old because we stop playing. I should get on a swing more often ;-)
Dena: Ok meet me at the starbucks on broadway and cambie. It should be easy to bike there. its all downhill Me: Haha I can tackle uphill. That's an insult! Dena: But you can also take the train that heads to waterfront and stop at broadway. Hahaha I'm just saying get there fast Me: I rather bike Dena: Cause I'm taking the train. Alright lets race then. Lol. {To set the record straight I got there first. Sure Dena, you had stuff to do. Haha ;-)}
One lovely cold Wednesday night. Waiting at a coffee shop at Cambie & Broadway, Vancouver. A coffee date with my daughter. Last time I saw her was three years ago. She entered the coffee shop, paid her coffee and said hi to me. She didn't even asked me for money. It's weird but heart-warming to see her act like a responsible, self-sufficient human being. I need to wake up and smell the coffee!
One lovely rainy Thursday evening. Filling out registration form for Vancouver Marathon on a terrace. My only daughter has been living there since 2012 so automatically I put her as my emergency contact person. Phone number? To my horror I just realised that I don't know hers! We communicate through Skype and Line. What kind of a mother doesn't have her daughter's mobile number? Oh no, my reputation as an awesome mom is at stake! But I have plan. If anyone throw that question my way with a put down look on his or her face, I have an answer: The kind that raise a very independent, self-sustain, problem-solver daughter, thank you very much! :-)
Dena do you remember our origami frog race when you were little? Guess what, the rules are getting more complicated when I play with Marvin and Maureen. If
you land on a shark you get 10 points to move forward. If you land on jellyfish you get double jump. And my favorite:If you land two
times on an octopus you get to level up.I'm suspicious that Marvin make up many more rules to advance his own frogs but I can't remember all these rules! Not only that we now have Ninja frog, Cool frog, Mother Queen frog, Princess frog, Invincible frog and more. All have super power. I miss playing with you. ;-)
Last time I got a root canal was long time ago when dinosaur roamed the earth. All I remembered was how painful it was. I mean really. Excruciating pain, pain with capital P. So when I found out my daughter fell asleep during a root canal I was dumbfounded. I'm sure dental tech is much better these days but who in the world fall asleep during a root canal? I think you have a low pain threshold, Dena. Let's go for a marathon! ;-)
Dena, my daughter, knows me too well. Even when she felt a bit under the weather she still think about me. She knows by heart that I am a worrywart. Darn! She didn't give me opportunities to get anxious. It's okay Dena, you can throw me anything, I'm better equipped now. I have a Lifeline. I think. ;-)
American Museum of Natural History. Stegosaurus. Ankylosaurus. And every-saurus under the sun. Like a kid in a candy store. Four hours went by so quickly. All this remind me of one thing. Denasaur. All your dinosaur drawings on A3 paper. Your dinosaur birthday. Your dino costume for Halloween. Hours of watching Land Before Time with you. Do you remember when you got scared in Taman Safari's Dino tunnel? Your dino plush toys: Little Foot, Cera, Petrie, Spike, Duckie. Wish you were here kiddo.
They say a character is a given thing. It is in your DNA. One can not change it even if he or she wants to. But I think a character is 30% given and 70% experience. How you deal with whatever Life throws at you will determine your character. It is possible to change. As a matter of fact it's mandatory to change. Dena, I'm sure you've outgrown occasionally assaulting, right? And I remembered a gloomy phase somewhere between grade 5 and grade 7. You've come a long way, baby! I should get an appraisal for Growth Chart in Adult's Behaviour annually. Or quarterly, or maybe bimonthly.
What is it about Vancouver that makes my daughter so adventurous in edible world? She grows her own herbs: spearmint, basil and cilantro; make bread, pizza dough and pesto sauce from scratch; and some oxtail soup. Must be all those clean air.
Saw so many of Dena's friends in Brian's farewell party at the Tobing's last nite. A lot taller. Listened to them jamming Maroon Five's Sunday Morning. Izaat asked me about my tattoos. Wish you were here, Dena. Everyone seemed to think that you are coming home this September. Everything there reminds me of you.
I told Dena over Skype today that I felt like a lousy mom because last time we talked was back in March. Then somewhere in today's conversation she said, "It's gonna sound mushy but the way you raise me has helped me with my relationship with Jeremy. We promised each other to solve any problem between us before the end of the day." Her words hugged me. Wait! Isn't it my job to comfort her? Stop acting like a grown up Dena!
Usually when Dena, my daughter who is 8289 miles away, texts me to send her monthly allowance before the end of a month I would give her a long reply about her financial well being. On and on and on I will continue texting her rows of an unsolicited financial advice. This time she didn't use any words at all. She made me laugh and forgot to give my usual long speech. Darn! She knows me too well. I sent the money the next day. A picture is definitely worth than a thousand words.
As a parent I find my brain and my heart fight all the time. My heart wants to protect my daughter all the time at any cost. My brain wants my daughter to be able to cope and persevere with whatever life throw at her. My poor mouth always caught in the middle.
